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Functional Alcoholism, Hangover City USA, The Daily Grind

The morning after

Two bottles of Gatorade later and I still feel like I’ve been punched in the face. My temples are aching and the only thing on my mind is McDonald’s breakfast and not throwing up in the car on the way to work.

Somehow, we end up trapped behind the most indecisive woman ever and it takes her aeons to decide what to eat – seriously, doesn’t everyone else pretty much get the same thing everytime they go to McDonald’s anyways?

Almost late for work, try to come up with a good excuse/hide remnants of McDonald’s.

Headache subsides slightly, only to come back with a vengeance.

Chat with customers about new stock and products I’m excited about.

Realize I’m a way better salesperson while hungover – take this as a sign I need to drink more.

Share this flash of brilliance with customers, who laugh – I’m also way funnier when hungover.

Head still feels like it’s going to explode, add a touch of nausea (stupid greasy breakfast!) and mysterious bruises and random drunken flashbacks to the mix

Sell, sell, sell.

Wonder why I felt the need to mix lemon gin and wine (my new favourite pregaming beverage)

Go to the bathroom for the first time that day, at 6 pm, that’s how dehydrated I was.

Vow to go to bed the second I get home, get sidetracked, and once I actually make it to bed, realize I can’t sleep.

Stupid insomnia.


About Nico

I'm not angry all the time, that's just how my face is.


5 thoughts on “The morning after

  1. Better salesperson with a hangover?Brilliant!

    Posted by GigglePixie | November 8, 2006, 9:08 am
  2. I think it’s just that I’m more focused when I’m hungover, you know, “play through the pain” and all that.It helps to distract me from the grinding pain between my temples

    Posted by team gingerbread | November 8, 2006, 9:33 am
  3. I used to work for Pottery Barn, best thing I could do was be hung over. It would keep me from throttling the snot nosed morons who shopped there.Oh, and I’ve always found the greasy breakfast helps.

    Posted by Jenn of the Jungle | November 8, 2006, 4:18 pm
  4. I’m saying…soymilk is marvelous for hangovers!

    Posted by Sushi the Mermaid | November 8, 2006, 7:17 pm
  5. jenn – sounds about right, I mean how coherent do you really have to be to work at pottery barn anyways?sushi – I’m gonna try it, but if I barf I’m gonna be upset…

    Posted by team gingerbread | November 8, 2006, 11:19 pm

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