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Quotables/Foot in Mouth Disease, The Daily Grind

Desperation is a colour that no one wears well

I just like that quote from my friend Adj.

I forgot to blog about my boss, whose name is dangerously close to ‘Moron’. My boss is probably one of the nicest women ever. She’s a little on the dumb side, but still very nice. She was on sick leave after having a heart attack and subsequent double bypass surgery, and only recently came back to work. You can tell that almost dying has changed her outlook on life, and that she was really bored while on leave. She regaled me with stories about how she threw out her husband’s ‘soft porn collection’.

I’m sitting in the coat check booth doing homework because I was waiting for the doors to open for a concert I was working, and she comes up to me and Low Talker(LT). She’s yammering on about who knows what, when a customer comes in. LT asks the guy for ID. The guy asks him to repeat himself and my boss interjects ‘He’s low-talker. That’s why you can’t hear what he’s saying. Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode? That’s what you are; a low-talker!’

LT is pretty taken aback because no one has had the guts to tell him to his face that he’s a low-talker. He stammers something about ‘saving his voice for when he really needs it’ and looks flustered. Then my boss asks us about what happened to all the bouncers she hired before she went on leave.

FemBoss: What happened to that black guy I hired?

Gingerbread: Who?

FemBoss: You know, that black guy…

LT: I really don’t know who you’re talking about. The last black guy you hired was Kennedy and before that it was before [Gingerbread] was hired

FemBoss: Wow, I could have sworn I had hired a dark-skinned guy

FemBoss: Oh well, maybe he wasn’t black, maybe he was white!

Gingerbread: Oh, do you mean that Hispanic guy, he worked here for 2 weeks?

FemBoss: Yup, that’s the one. Thank God! I thought I was going crazy! (totters off)

i’m out, team gingerbread

*oh, and I wanted to send a special thank you to JWo. I won’t be finishing my paper until the wee hours of the morning the day it’s due since you brought me the first season of Dead Like Me.


About Nico

I'm not angry all the time, that's just how my face is.


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